The Killian family plot (no relation) at Oakland Cemetery with daffodils starting to sprout at each headstone. 

(Want to read about the new astrology update? Click here!)

Hello and welcome! This site is a new venture by Killian (they/them pronouns please), where I occasionally invite you to see the world through Death Tinted Glasses with me. My plan is to use this platform to talk about death in all its forms. Not just the death of a person, but also the death of a job, a relationship, a season, or even a tree. I also want to talk about death through the lens of fiction. Have you ever cried when a fictional character died? I guarantee you others have cried about that same death. Talking about the death of one's own mother is tough and heavy, but talking about the death of Bambi’s mother is easier to approach. We all experienced that same death even if we experienced it at different times and in different ways, and I believe there is power in that shared experience.

Assuming you are with me so far, you might still find yourself wondering why this is important? Why in the world do we need to have an ongoing relationship with something as overwhelming as death? I have a few answers to that query:

One is about balance. Everything has a beginning (or birth), just as everything has an ending (or a death). If we put all our focus on the beginnings and avoid dealing with endings, then we wind up with an unbalanced view of the world. And truly, isn’t the world unbalanced enough right now?

Second, smarter people than me have posited that death is one of our biggest motivating factors in life. It is part of why we have children, or why the wealthy put their names on buildings, or why new discoveries are made. It is why someone runs for president, becomes a priest, a teacher, or a mortician. It is all an effort to create a legacy bigger than yourself, to create a lasting impact on the world, so you live on after death. Therefore, if we don’t closely examine how the fear (and other feelings) around death show up in our lives then we end up making decisions based in fear without even realizing it. I don’t know about you but I definitely do not want my decisions to be unknowingly fear based.

Finally, and on a more personal level, I am a person who has dealt with a lot of anxiety throughout my life, and I have found that information is one of the best anxiety fighters at my disposal. No medication is required when armed with knowledge. My wildest hope for when I die is that I get to know and understand all the secrets of the universe. This need for understanding is why I have always been interested in talking about death, also known as one of life's greatest mysteries. Even so, I don’t expect to ever fully understand it, nor do I think the information I gather will magically make it easier when someone I love dies. But I do know that the more information I have, the better I will be able to process the event.

If any of this sounds interesting I invite you to join me on this first leg of my journey. I am not sure yet how this project will shape up. Thank you in advance for bearing with me as I figure out my voice. You probably will not agree with or appreciate everything I have to say, which is to be expected. I know I can’t please every person every time after all. So I will close with what all my favorite creators are saying these days, take what resonates with you and leave all the rest.